Saturday, March 24, 2007

Back from hospital

The surgery went well although it was certainly more painful than my
c-section was. I am really SORE. It gets better day by day. I don't
remember anything except being wheeled into the OR and the Vercett being given to me IV (gotta love the memory erasing powers of Vercett
). I awoke sore and very tired. Will and Lilith stayed awhile with me
till it was obvious that I was going to keep passing out. They awoke me
later that afternoon for a walk (you are required to do 6 walks a day
to prevent blood clots). The first walk I was leaning over the platform
walker and moaning. It was pretty pathetic to watch I am sure. By the
second walk, I was still leaning over the walker but I was doing much
better. By the second day, I wasn't even using the walker, just my
hospital friend MR. IV. I had a RN that I worked with at Saint
Anthony's every night that I was there and she was lovely. She hung out
in my room and talked to me and gave me lots of encouragement. It was
great to catch up. I was given a "Tummy Teddy" that is a super cute large firm Teddy
bear that wears a Rose Medical Center tee shirt and has a cute face, he
has to be so darn cute because you are expected to splint with him and
cough at least once every 15 minutes (splinting is when you hold
against your stomach or chest {if it is cardiac surgery} to brace it,
it is very painful. I was also expected to use the incentive spiromiter
once every 15 minutes while awake. Let me tell you, if you think you
are going to rest after this surgery, you are WRONG! The second day I
went down for my endoscopy where I had to drink "devil juice" (as a
described it to me before hand) and take a standing chest x-ray, then
sip the "devil juice" (which actually tasted like the worst cherry
cough syrup you can imagine) and stand in front of this moving table
(yes the table moves, they might not tell you this and in your Morphine
induced stupor
you might just think it's you thinking it is moving ever so slightly
till it lays you back!) while they film the devil juice going through
your pouch and new intestine. It is kinda neat to watch. They had me
4 sips to get different views, I only felt nauseous when the table
leaned me back for one of the views. Then I went back to my room
hugging my Tummy Teddy
the whole way, I must have looked pretty silly in that wheel chair.
They brought a cot for Will but he ended up going home each evening
because Lilith would start to cry and beg for breasty , which I couldn't
give due to the narcotics. Did I mention I was pumping and dumping my
milk every 3 hours in addition to everything else? She loved all of the
attention from the staff though. When we were waiting to go into
surgery, Lilith was laying on me breastfeeding when Dr. Snyder came in
talk to me. He looked at Lilith (Who was smiling and flirting with him
like she does with everyone)and said, "You are reminding me to be
especially careful
with your mommy aren't you". I took a super small picture of Lilith and
taped it to my forearm so I could look at it when I came out of OR and
honestly for others to see so yes, they knew I had someone depending on
me. I was expected to drink 30ml every 15 minutes while awake to keep
They had to keep me on the IV an extra day because I wasn't doing too
well at this. You are expected to alternate water with a protein drink.
You may think 30mls isn't much but when you consider that your new pouch only holds 1oz, you have to realize that you are sipping that 30mls. They gave me a Carmel flavored protein drink that you can get from Walgreen' called optisource. It wasn't too bad. I also was given some Isopure (available at GNC)
that I already purchased and have some here at home. You are REQUIRED
to get in 60 grams of protein a day. This is super important for me
since I am nursing.
I was finally allowed to take a shower the second
day and it felt wonderful. I looked at my incisions for the first time
after my shower. I have 6 small incisions. One has a jp
drain coming out of it that will be pulled at my one week follow up
appointment. On the opposite side was one with a primrose drain in it
that was pulled late my second day and it didn't hurt at all, I am
pretty sure the JP is going to hurt allot more that it did. The other 4
are sealed with dermabond. I am sore mostly on the left side (where most of the work was done)
but I am very pleased at the size of the incisions and the general lack
of swelling and bruising . Everyone praises Dr. Snyder as being the
best, guess it must be true. I also had a central line in my neck that
they pulled right before discharge (painless). I pulled my own Foley
catheter (with permission) on the second day before my shower. You are
given a huge handbook with post op instructions and locations of the
REQUIRED post op nutrition class. You go to one at one week post op (starting purees),
month post op(starting soft solids then solids) and one year post
op(regulating portions of regular food). You are also STRONGLY advised
to start attending a support group. The list of several support groups
are included in the book. You also have to do follow up appointments with Dr. Snyder at, 1 week, 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 9 weeks, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months, then yearly.
You might ask for some (or hide some everyday so they bring you more) disposable medicine cups and some drain sponges
(a specialized bandage that goes around your JP). You need to change it
once a day and drain and compress it when it gets full. The medicine
cups are great for the measuring and recording the drainage from your jp
but also for sipping protein and water from. I am sipping "Protein
Zone" by Naked. It is the best tasting protein drink I have had so far.
It also has 38 grams of protein in 15.2 fluid oz, meaning a little less
than 2 of them a day would get all of your protein in. Believe me, when
you are sipping on something for hours, the more protein it has per
the better (the less you have to sip). For part of my required walking
to day, we went to Whole Foods, gotta love my hubby who suggested this. Shopping, even in some pain is still kinda fun. We bought, Natures Plus "source of Life" women's liquid "liquilicious natural berry flavor" liquid multi vitamin. You have to be on a multi vitamin for the rest of your life along with a sub lingual or liquid B-12, and a liquid or chewable calcium (I bought MRM orange- vanilla flavor calcium- magnesium- zinc liquid and Solaray vitamin B-12 2000mcg sub lingual). Okay I have some tips about the "liquilicious natural berry flavor multi vitamin"
, even though the dose is only 2 table spoons... It should be taken
SLOWLY! And don't look at it if you can get someone else to pour and
measure it out for you, do so. It if the endoscope liquid was Devil
Juice, then this is the WRATH OF HELL JUICE! It is so awful to look at
and to drink, it also made me have cramping after I drank the 2
tablespoons at once. I don't think I can drink this multi vitamin for
the rest of my life (I bought a 30 day supply and that is going to be
bad enough), I will be looking for a better brand very soon. I
purchased several books on weight loss surgery from The best one I have had a chance to read so far has been, "Weight loss Surgery For Dummies". It is funny yet informative. I also purchased several post weight loss surgery cookbooks. It will be awhile before I can try those. I have both of Carnies Wilson's
books too. I am getting a bike seat for Lilith for my birthday. Our
neighborhood is great for stroller walks and bike rides. There are
several parks near by also. I unfortunately cannot go swimming for 6
weeks. We had been going once a week to the local recreation center to
swim. It has 2 indoor water slides, a little kids water slide, a lazy
river ride, a family hot tub (with a lower temperature than the adult
one), a water park, a water fall, and family changing cabanas. We took
a cheap disposable water camera last time we went but not one of the
photos came out. I will try again though in 6 weeks. Lilith has a baby
crab boat that we take her on the lazy river ride in and she loves it.
I will feel so much better and more confident at the pool and at the
mommy and me play dates now. There are only a few (like 2)larger moms
in the mommy and me group and I don't want to spend the whole time
sitting and visiting with them (although they are very nice) instead of
going down the slides with Lilith and playing chase with her now that
she can crawl, etc. I wanted to have this surgery before she was
walking so I could keep up with her and so I would be fit enough to be
active with her, not a couch- fetch it for me mom. I am so glad that I
was able to.
There are some things that I will have to give up
forever (rice, sugars, popcorn, fried foods,etc) but being healthy and
fit for my daughter is worth it all. Will has been super supportive. He
has been taking care of Lilith and bringing me my water and protein when
I am napping (you are pretty tired after this surgery for days I am
told). He was able to take a week off to be with me and to help with
Lilith, thank Goodness. I won't be able to lift Lilith till next week,
about the time he goes back to work. I am breasty feeding her while laying on my side (I cant lay her across my abdomen
yet). I took before measurements and photos and plan of keeping track
of my losses. They say you can expect to loose 60% of you total excess
weight in the first 6 weeks! But it isn't a quick fix, you still have
to exercise and follow their dietary/vitamin requirements for the rest
of your life. You will get very sick if you don't. This isn't my
unicorn, I know it won't solve all of my problems but it will make me
healthier and is a tool that when properly used, will make it easier
for me to loose down to and maintain a healthy weight. You have to
always have protein first and never have sugary things again. Breads
and white pastas are no-nos too. Rice can get stuck and require surgery
to remove. It is a drastic surgery and I wouldn't have had it if I
thought I could do it on my own, I can't. I have lost weight many times
and been thin many times but never by healthy means and I have to
starve or exercise like a crazy person to maintain. I know that too is
unhealthy. I have someone else depending on me and watching me. I want
her to have a happy healthy mom, not a fat, sad one. If I have to go
through this to make that happen, then it is all worth it, although I
will miss Diet Coke and carbonated drinks every once in awhile.

On a negative note......I was afraid at first to post anything about my
having this surgery because I knew certain individuals would
poo poo all over it due to their jealousy and insecurity . I thought
about it and the many caring, supportive, and emotionally stable people
that do read my blog and decided that this is exactly the type of thing
I should be writing about. It is something that is life changing and
very important to me, why shouldn't I write about it. It wouldn't be so
bad if I didn't have to hear what these people say but I do. I guess
they don't realize that they have screwed over enough people that this
is bound to happen. These individuals have always underestimated the intelligence of others, they believe
they are the only ones that are devious enough to collect passwords and
forward e-mails. They never think that other people realize that when
someone is running a person down to you, they are probably running you
down to someone else. When you read this persons blog it is always the
same, every few months they screw someone out of time, money, trust,
etc. Then the post comes that says, "poor me, I am the victim here,
everyone needs to mind their own business, I had to do what I did,
these other people are lying (or overreacting or both), I have to think
of my family (myself, my home, etc), why does everyone want to hurt
poor me, why doesn't anyone believe me, fuck all of you, etc." Then
comes the, "I've really changed post", "I am working on becoming a
better (friend, parent, wife, person, sociopath, etc), I am going to
start, (going to school, paying my bills, medication, a new job,
cleaning my house, getting therapy, etc), I am sorry for what I did,
really honestly, I have learned not to do this again, etc." Then if the
person that they have wronged doesn't magically forgive them, they are
a jerk (I am actually being much nicer than they are) and they run them
down and try to harass the other person while getting their family to
write nasty things about the other person in the pretense of
"defending" our friend the victim . If this persons family really cared
about them you would think they would say, look this keeps happening in
your life, with different people, maybe you need to ask yourself why
you keep allowing this to happen or what you are doing to cause this.
Because the only constant in this is you. But they never do, maybe it
isn't worth the effort. At least when I am acting stupid or getting
caught up in something negative, my family and husband tell me so. The
saddest part is at least I was honest and have been every time this
person continues to try to contact me, even pretending to be her
daughter, I severed all contact with her years ago and have stated
multiple times that I never want her to be apart of my life again. I
truly am sorry that she is so lonely and her life is so boring that she
still clings to this blog for material to write nasty things about me.
I was honest too when I said that she isn't even the same person that
was once one of my very close friends, but hey, people change, (and
sometimes not for the better)and grow apart. That's okay because it
leaves room for new friends that are on the same level as you and have
similar interests as you do(not just inernet porn or sex, unless that is all you have to offer as a friend). I do make all of this public because I
don't want to encourage any personal contact (although even knowing
that I will publish anything openly never stops this person from harassing
me) and because unfortunately, as long as this person keeps running me
down (and I keep having to hear about it),and trying to stalk me, it is
an unfortunate part of my life. I am writing this not to encourage any
form of contact or to remind this person of their need for drama, but to
make them realize that, just because someone says or acts like all is
forgiven, doesn't mean it really is. Maybe when some one has forgiven
you and you think you have sucked them back into your cycle of lets
stir up some "shit" every few weeks because your lives are really that
boring or maybe your cable is cut off again and you need some
excitement because you have nothing in your life to be excited or happy
about, because you spend too much time trying to cause drama and
looking at other peoples lives instead of looking at your own...maybe
it is you that is the one that has been sucked in and you are the one
being "played". There are plenty of people out there willing to listen
to your "problems" (never offer solutions), tell you that you are
always right(never ever telling you that you are the one that is acting
stupid or that maybe you shouldn't do this or that), listen to how all
of these people have "hurt you" and sit there and agree how awful they
are (never saying that maybe you were wrong or that they can see the
other persons point of view), and encourage you to do more foolish and outrageous
things that will only hurt you in the long run. Why? Maybe their cable
is off or they are just as bored and manipulative as you are. You know
what they say, birds of a feather... I hope that this person reads this
(and I know they will) and thinks twice before they run another person
down or posts another nasty blog that they think will never get back to
the person they are running down (talk about chicken shit). You cant
continually use and abuse people without it karmically coming back on
you. I would think you would realize that. I hope this is the last time
I have to read nasty things about myself (that this person was too
scared to post openly) but I am not getting my hopes up as this cycle
has been going on for years. May this individual needs to turn the
computer off every once in awhile and go play with their kids, go
shopping, go to counseling (hey I know that will never happen), go try
to a museum, or a movie, join a gym, etc. Maybe if they were to get
enough positive things going in their life (and maybe some
antidepressants, hey I admitted I couldn't manage my weight and got
help, it is possible this person could realize that they can't manage
their moods and get help), they wouldn't be so negative towards their
family, "friends", and life in general. Wouldn't it be great to feel
good about life? My life may not be perfect but I have certainly
noticed that when I have a more positive outlook, good things happen,
getting approved for this surgery after years of trying, getting a
raise at work, moving into our new house, getting my dream car, etc.
Oh, well, I am probably talking to a brick wall, but at least I tried,
at even though what I have said maybe hurtful, at least I am honest. I could have said nothing and kept on reading what was provided to me and kept being a part of the negative cycle but I am through with negative and deciteful people, otherwise this person would still be my friend and none of this would be happening, but I am honest and don't feel the need to "HIDE" my feelings and opinions. I
don't forgive this person, and I probably never will unless their life
does a 360 and I don't ever see that happening, it's too much work for
this person. Besides they seem comfortable in their negativity. Maybe
it is fitting that after all of these years of being so nosey and trying to keep tabs on everyone elses business, that someone is airing this persons and having a great time dong it too from the sound of things.
Well, I found out what I wanted to know, funny title to your latest entry by the way. Can't stop laughing at your stupididy.

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